Yesterday my father was on my mind. He passed away in July, 2002. With all that is going on in the world today I guess I was missing him and wondering what words of advice he would have today or better yet, what could he tell me about years before my time that could be useful in today’s world.
My father is buried outside of Creswell, North Carolina. It’s about an hour 1/2 drive and it was late in the day when I had the urge for the drive.
My father’s final resting place is a lonely one. It’s so quiet and somber. Maybe it’s how it should be.
It brings out sadness when you get out of the car. Makes you wonder if the ones buried here are remembered by anyone.
I remember when he passed away the times I made the drive and had it out with my father on things I felt I couldn’t openly discuss with him while he was still living. These were moments of sadness mixed with anger. Sad that I didn’t have the courage to have these moments while he was still among the living. These finally ended with me forgiving my father for perceived wrongs from him and realizing how suddenly life was different with him gone. Now the arguments were no longer important. This time the conversation was different.
I looked to my left and saw my cousin buried there and saw the date on her headstone, she passed several months before my father. My aunt who I’ve told myself several years before that I forgave for how things ended with my father and what she did afterwards…. seeing the dates for a moment made me realize that maybe she was going through the death of her child and my father and she was acting out of grief. That being said I do forgive her any anger and ill will I have harbored in my heart. I, however, have no desire to speak with her.
This time I apologized to my father for being cocky and arrogant believing I knew it all and that things he was trying to tell me weren’t important. This time I was telling my father fighting back tears that I wished I had listened to wisdom he was trying to give me. That maybe I wouldn’t be dealing with situations I’ve created otherwise.
I finally had nothing more to tell my father and the chill in the air was getting a bit much so I bid my father farewell and decided to drive through Creswell, North Carolina. This town seems to have been forgotten by time.
My father was raised in Columbia, North Carolina. It’s only nine miles from Creswell so I continued the journey.
When I was young I hated coming to this town.
There was nothing to do, it was too quiet and I used to get my dad upset when I asked him was the stoplight the same color on all sides.
Things have changed. The main freeway runs through the town towards the Outer Banks. Seems to have breathed a nice little bit of life into this sleepy community. Now, I find it a desirable place to stay. I wish the Covid virus mess wasn’t going on. I would have enjoyed going into some of the shops.
It was getting late and I left Columbia about 6PM and stopped in the town of Edenton for a quick dinner and to continue on home.
It was a long drive but worth it.